Wednesday 15 August 2012

A Cut Below?

So here we have another of “my” blogs, not a hint of volunteer management anywhere- you have been warned!  

This blog originated from a conversation had after work over a drink (where the best stories start). Goodness only knows how we got around to it but talk turned to male grooming. Now this isn’t the stubble debate, nor Beckham’s latest hairstyle or what metrosexuality actually means but a conversation about what I shall call “male intimate grooming”. I would by no means consider myself naïve but I hadn’t a clue just how common it seems to be! The only other man at the table said, quite frankly, that he “trimmed regularly” as if it was as normal as brushing one’s teeth in the morning. In response to this one of the women piped up that her partner does too and another said rather emphatically that she “insists her partner do it”. So how commonplace was this practice and where had it come from? I knew someone who regularly extolled the virtues of a shorn scrotum (not the words he used) but I thought by the reaction it received it was generally accepted this was not the norm. Had something completely passed me by? 

After some of my usual methodologically sound SUPER-SCIENTIFIC INVESTIGATION I have established that nether-topiary for men seems to have one distinct rule (an opinion generally shared by men and women); neat is good but shaved is weird and a bit porn-y! On top of this I know that for many men the daily ritual of shaving our faces is a little too much (and razor blades are bloody expensive) so it is unlikely we will make even more work for ourselves any time soon. But most of what I was hearing was leaning towards a view that this was commonplace and natural. I was on shaky ground here because I usually feel uneasy about pubic hair debates. They are generally aimed at women and almost always negative, but this was easy and conversations were relaxed. In this case we blokes seem to once again avoid such scrutiny and get the easy life, which might be why I haven’t felt the power of the advertising media compelling me to coiffure my bush! I didn’t feel pressure but instead there was intrigue and the rather amusing “I don’t want a bush tucker trial if I’m with a guy and I go down there” attitude from one woman that did make me wonder how important people thought it was. Other people’s opinions out of the way, why should I find it odd that men choose to do this? I go to a hairdresser for a haircut, clip my nails, shave and what facial hair I retain is styled, but some 17 or so years since my body decided to start sprouting fuzz I have generally let it be.

Stood over the bath, mirror strategically placed and trimmer in hand I felt at a point of no return, driven not by media or peer pressure but by genuine curiosity and the knowledge that if something went wrong at least it would grow back. Not really knowing where to start I went for it and everything seemed to be going ok. I was then reminded that symmetry is not easily achieved when back to front and the wrong way up. Numerous rounds of “evening up” followed (complete with a moment of panic when the trimmer ran out of charge). This being said I was pleased with the result, as a debutant at any activity might be with a job well done, and there was certainly no going back.

So how does this story end (or what was the bloody point of me sharing this with the world)? Well I think I can say I’m now a convert! A mown man-muff seems to be the way forward for me. It is easier to maintain, quicker to dry, aesthetically more appealing and (dare I say it) the wonders of perspective and framing have had a positive side-effect visually! I have been able to assess my options, make a decision free from pressure or judgement and when it comes down to it I’m the one who has to live with my body. If anything, this silly experiment has provided a stark reminder of the contrasting attitudes and pressures faced by women when it comes to body hair. I hope that in reading my “emotional journey” it might prompt some other chaps to give it a try, but more importantly to recognise that we live in a culture which denies women freedom from scrutiny and judgement in what should be personal choices. 

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